By Gugapriya M
From the moment someone shares the news of a pregnancy, one of the first questions people ask is “Is it a boy or a girl?” It sounds like simple curiosity, but hidden beneath it is a long-standing social belief that the answer somehow defines how much joy a child will bring.
For generations, the arrival of a baby boy has been met with sweets, celebrations and pride. But yet, when it’s a girl, the smiles sometimes fade into silence. People smile, but not with the same sparkle. Some offer half-hearted congratulations. Others simply say, “Don’t worry, maybe next time.”
The Lingering Bias We Don't Talk About
We’ve come a long way from the darker days of female infanticide and gender-selective abortions, but let’s be honest: gender bias still exists. It shows up in whispers, glances and careless remarks that sting. It shows up in who gets the bigger celebration, in who’s called a blessing and who’s quietly considered a compromise.
And it’s often mothers who carry the weight of it all.
Many women, especially those who already have one or more daughters, speak openly in online forums about the emotional conflict they face. They’re not disappointed in their baby they love their daughters deeply.
And yet, a simple question like “Another girl?” or “Will you be trying for a boy?” can bring a familiar discomfort. It may seem casual, but it often carries the weight of expectation, a subtle reminder that for many, the idea of a ‘complete’ family is still tied to having a son.
The Cultural Roots Run Deep
In a patriarchal society like India, this pressure is magnified. Boys are still seen by many as the ones who will carry on the family name, stay with the parents and provide support in old age. Daughters, meanwhile, are often seen as temporary raised with love but expected to leave, often with dowry.
This mindset has contributed to a significant gender imbalance in our population, a painful result of valuing one gender over the other.
But the Story Is Changing and there is hope.
More and more families are rewriting the narrative. Daughters are no longer seen as second best, but as strong, bright and capable as assets not burdens. Girls today are topping exams, building startups, caring for aging parents and leading with compassion.
Many now say with joy, “Our Lakshmi has arrived,” welcoming daughters as symbols of prosperity and pride.
The Change starts with us and yeah, It doesn’t happen overnight. It begins with what we say. With what we believe. With how we show up not just for sons, but for every child.
We need to stop asking families if they’re “trying again” for a particular gender. A child’s worth should never be reduced to their gender. Whether it’s the first girl or the third, they all deserve to be celebrated with the same love, joy and support.
Every baby Is a New Beginning because every baby boy or girl is a miracle. They come into the world holding dreams yet to be discovered. A story waiting to unfold. A bundle of love, dreams and infinite potential.
So the next me someone shares their big news, skip the “Boy or girl?” and ask instead:
“How are you feeling?”
Because in the end, it’s not about the gender. It’s about the love, the journey and the joy of welcoming a new life into the world.
Here we are celebrating you too, Mamma.